blurry

pexels-photo-241328

I really love to read. In this season of life I’m in, it’s not as easy to get through a book, no matter how much I love it. But I’ve realized as I’ve gotten older that I’m such a skimmer! I’ve always been proud that I can read fast…which, I can. But there are times I definitely let my eyes kind of skip over some words here or there, and it’s never bothered me because I usually get the gist. Most times, it’s really not a big deal.

Except when it is. It doesn’t really work the same with God. Like on the days where I’m feeling like, “God, where’s the disconnect? I know you want to talk to me. And I want to hear from you. I’m doing all the right things. Where ya at?”

And lately, what have I been doing? Skimming. Browsing. Honestly, searching through the Bible for the perfect WORD from the Lord for my day. Like, when I open up the book, it will jump out at the page at me and I’ll just know. Honestly, that’s happened a few times. But God’s not a magic genie. And for that, I’ve learned to be grateful.

Today, I skimmed my way through Psalms. Cracked it open and – got Psalm 139… okay, I know that one. Next. Psalm 140…eh. Psalm 141, “set a guard over my mouth…” Been there, heard that. And what did I do? I got distracted and never really landed anywhere.

I’ve been feeling a little like my time with God is blurry. Like James says, “anyone who listens to the word but does not do what it says is like someone who looks at his face in a mirror and, after looking at himself, goes away and immediately forgets what he looks like.” I’ve never resonated with that verse. Until this week. I would go back and look through my prayer journal from that morning, or the day before, and it was like I wrote it 2 years ago. Nothing has been sticking. Ever been there?

Until I was doing my homework for a Bible Study I’m in. And where in the Bible did it bring me? Psalm 141. Mind you, this is a study on Daniel. I’m reading it and thinking, “Hmm. This looks kind of familiar.” I literally had glanced over it that morning.

But in my vain search for the perfect moment; the perfect word from God, I was completely missing the moment He was already in.

If I had settled where God already was, I would have asked Him to set a guard over my mouth for the day. Which, in retrospect, was totally what I needed today. But because those weren’t “new” words for me to read, I almost disregarded them.

God’s word is never changing, but always new. God’s word is always alive. God’s love for you never ends. He is faithful and holy and perfect.

….

If I was reading this blog, I’d skim over those sentences.

I’ve heard them before. I know they’re true. …Next.

Go back and read them again.

Psalm 141 starts out this way:

O Lord, I call to you; come quickly to me. Hear my voice when I call to you.”

Right in front of me were the exact words I needed, but I was too busy searching for what I thought was something else. Like I had decided ahead of time what God wanted to tell me.

Let’s quit skimming. Let’s stop multitasking when it comes to what God wants to do in our life. Put away the phone. Turn off Netflix. Tune in.

God will get our attention somehow. I would rather be still, and be willing to see Him in the moments He’s already planned for me – rather than searching until I’m dizzy only to find my He was waiting the whole time.

He’s promised to never leave me. What would it be like if I really lived like I believed that?

Let’s open up our eyes to see what’s already in front of us.

It’s Him.

Always has, always will be.

Advertisements

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s